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Pastorpreneur and Creative Risk Taker for the Kingdom of God

Four Weeks to Healthier Relationships

A number of years ago while I was pastoring a church in NV,  I got the opportunity to write a little book on relationships called “Four Weeks to Healthier Relationships”.  There is a weekly overview, a daily guide, and then a reflection section.  You can get a copy on Amazon here in Kindle for under $5!:

Here is a bit about the book that might help you decide if you want to read it:

We are, by design, relational beings. God intended us to live in relationship with Him and with each other. So if you are breathing, this topic applies to you. Relationships permeate our lives. You may be reading this because you are thinking primarily about a marriage relationship. You may be thinking about a parenting relationship, or perhaps a friendship or an extended family member, or co-worker. Every single one of us is involved in relationships and we know that part of being healthy people is having healthy relationships. C.S. Lewis said it this way: “We are born helpless, and as soon as we are fully conscious we discover loneliness.” We need others physically, emotionally, intellectually – we need them if we are to know anything, even ourselves. 

Sometimes, laws which govern our physical universe also can govern our relationships. Take for example this one: Anything that is neglected will go from order to disorder. If relationships are not tended to, they move towards decay. Healthy relationships are part of healthy living and healthy relationships need attention. Being healthy means having healthy relationships. Romans 12:10 puts it this way: “Love must be sincere, hate what is evil, cling to what is good. Be devoted to each other in brotherly love, honor one another above yourselves.” The Message translation puts it another way, in a way that really strikes me: “Love from the center of who you are; do not fake it. Run for dear life from evil; hold on for dear life to good. Be good friends who love deeply; practice playing second fiddle.”1 

Two phrases in those verses jump out at me: Be good friends who love deeply. Practice playing second fiddle. Now the truth is that I know how to hydroplane through life. I have mastered the art of quick and low-flying trajectory through life. I have learned to love superficially. But, when it says be good friends who love deeply, I am pulled up short. How many relationships in my life can I truly say I love deeply? To love deeply takes a lot of my self – it takes energy, it takes effort, it means I have to take risks. Loving deeply is part of what it means to be a healthy person in healthy relationship. 


President of Jessup University (, speaker and author of books on leadership and transformation

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